Well Hell.

Sometimes that feeling comes over like an early morning fog at the south end of the valley, thick and hard to see through, but occasionally clears up enough so you can see the sun and the blue sky for about 5 seconds before the lonesome feeling blankets you again. The self-loathing isn't with it, which is good, but the way it settles in my chest and my gut just weighs me down.

I also need to start paying attention to zipping up after I take a piss. Today I discovered I did it again. I don't know if anyone saw or not, and luckily these boxers still have a button on the gap so nothing peeks out and says hello to the world. Hell, it's almost like being in Jr. High again with those dopey going-to-school-without-any-pants-on kind of dreams. Only they're not dreams.

But at least I can still open the bathroom door without touching the handle with my bare hands.