If You're Gonna' Fuck With Someone's Life Then It's Best to Keep Your Goddamm Mouth Shut About It.

yeah, I'm pissed.

And the fucker this is aimed at won't ever read this.

That Better Not Be a Train

First, an apology. I'm sorry for anyone who thought there was actually a horse being starved to death. It was just a straight-up analogy for running a business into the ground. On a high note, the old mare I've been vetting on since early December is almost healed up (finally!!!). It's funny- before she moved to our place I thought she was a doll. Then I thought she was a nag. Now, me and her have an understanding. But I guess after damn near nine months of me taking bandages on and off of her and dealing with the ups and downs of the whole damn situation, you'd build a bond. It's been a long time since she's tried kicking me while I tried to get her wrapped.

You know, I think there's finally a light at the end of this godforesaken tunnel. We finally came to terms with Mr. Shithead and his wife, so we might have a house sold. And we've found one!!! Similar acreage, nicer house and a shop set up with 220. Time for me to learn to weld!

I've got to keep looking ahead. I'm so damn lonely and tired and stressed and hormonal and overwhelmed I've got to keep pushing forward or I'll collapse. I've got too much on my plate. But I know if I make it through this week, there's only a mountain and a four hour drive between me and my girls (who are as stressed as I am but doing well, thank you for asking cant!). When I see the missus she hates for me to leave and the girl gives me all her attention. It's painful to think of how much I'm missing. I hate to think because of false-hearted buyers and the rest of the gamers and snakes out there I'm missing out on my girl and the missus. I've missed so goddammed much. Too much. Smiles, kisses, crawls, tears - the whole damn thing. I'll be damned if I miss anymore.


But I will. I'm a traveling business-type person now. Next week is NYC. Next month St. Paul (you know where that is, dont!), and then after that who knows where. Seattle. SoCal. Chicago. Miami. Who knows. I try not to think about it. It's what I do to help provide for my girls and keep them in insurance. I hope she understands later.